Copying

Copying. Makes me feel stupid. I feel like I'm getting dumber from every day that passes by. I'm starting to question how much of my work is actually my work. I'm feeling like a total failure right now. Feels like I'm copying every other thing nowadays. It's not a good feeling. I wish I would stop, but my procrastinating demons won't leave me. I question how well I'll do in school. Essays? Those haven't been doing so well. When I do my own work it seems to always turn out bad. How am I supposed to take SATs like this? I don't even know anymore. Right at this moment I'm feeling the worst I've felt in a while. My chest is feels like it's on fire and choking up. I can't even write a decent essay anymore. Even this is a bunch of jumbled up sentences that hardly make much sense. This all needs to change now. Maybe this is just how things are supposed to be, but I don't know. I don't feel the sense of pride from getting my own work done anymore, it always feels like it's someone else's because it probably is. From here on out I'm changing the way I conduct things. If I don't then things will only get worse.

Weekending

Friday - Being decisive for once and made the decision to go to the Aquabats concert, which was the right choice. Yo Gabba Gabba was so awesome, Hunter Revenge was forgettable, and The Aquabats was cool. Moshing was intense and scary as all hell when I fell on the floor. Planet Terror was hilarious. Need to finish Death Proof because we had to go right at the best part. Anybody want an Aquabats sticker?

Saturday - Slept a good 12 hours then went on an adventure filled with thrills.

Sunday - Sleep, eat, lounge. Once again procrastinating....I must stop. My neck and arms are sore from who knows what. I should get a good night's sleep tonight, but who knows how that will go.

The sound of jazz flows into my room from downstairs, relaxing. Nice music to reflect to. I need to watch more movies, read more books, listen to more music, find a way to make money. I feel like destroying something...something amazing or beautiful. Or just destroying some pixels on my computer. Someone get me a beard cap, a Japanese Aquabats shirt, and a BIG messenger bag to go on my back.